You’re my best friend and I’ve never met you.

Sometimes friends are really fun. I love friends. Especially Jaymie. Especially Amada.

it ran under my bed.

i stood up.

i fell down hard on my tempered glass desk.

my head split open.

i’m seisuring on my bed, bleeding.

i ran under my bed.

I’m enjoying this page so much but this page is almost over and I’m not bored.  Granted I’ve been speed reading this but whatever, you still get the content.  I guess what weirds me out is that I’m not nervous to turn over the page;  I’m not scared of the story that’s being told.  I’m not even scared about it ending.  I guess I’m kind of zen reading, but I’ve not been so zen about a book ever.

This is a really good book.  Let’s read it!

Times have changed but I have not.  You knew me then and you know me now.  My heart longs for what you can give.  My mind knows I can’t handle it.

Looking at you then, a treasure to behold.  Looking at you now even more so.  Your walk, your eyes, your quirks, your (understandably) held back kiss.

All those times I said no, were because I wasn’t ready.  Now it’s that you were ready for too long.  I want to hold you but I can’t.  Your quicksand heart would drape itself all over my floor as I wept.  I’m draped all over your floor as I weep.

The kink in my armor?  After all those years of wondering I’ve realized that I do love you.

I also love the noise the sixth step on the path to my room goes “creeeeek.”

remember when we played in the field across the street together?  when i would swing on the swings and you would push me, not physically but with your little heart.

the way you look at me almost makes me lose control.

behind those eyes.  hurting and suffering.  holding your hand now and being with you is the most valuable thing i could possibly have because it might be one of the last times i get to feel your warmth.

we can’t play anymore.

numbness overtakes your limbs and your eyes droop.  you don’t seem to be able to hear me and when i say your name your eyes simply wonder the room, disoriented and maybe scared.

i wish i could know what you’re thinking.

you’ve always been such a good friend and now that things are changing so rapidly i don’t know what to do with myself.  my fingers don’t work and my arms feel disconnected from my body.

i’m going to miss you so much.

I’d want to be holding your hand and smiling.

I wrote hateful letters to your family members and I taught something I didn’t believe.

We’re great friends, I just hate everything about you.

Looking through this glass window into your world, this is what I see.  You’re weak and failing and I don’t feel the least bit responsible.  You’re toppling head over feet down this hill and I’m grinning.  I thought you were having fun.

However, away from work.  Last night I saw the Cirque Du Soleil Performance Ka.

It was one of the most amazing things I think I’ve ever experienced.  Cirque’s Website describes Ka as “a heroic journey of love and conflict, set within a dynamic theatrical landscape, as an entire empire appears on KÀ’s colossal stage and a captivating display of acrobatics envelops the audience”.  I would totally agree with that.  The practice and grace that is involved in these shows is completely amazing.  All of the choreographed dancing and acrobatics was so perfectly timed and tied together that I could hardly handle it.  I really enjoyed that there was always something going on and all of the performers were always in character.  I was in the front row and I watched one of the girls when she was hiding offstage (almost at my feet) and she was peeking over the stage and giggling at the things people were doing on stage.

Overall I found it to be not only a fantastic stage show but also an amazing show of acrobatics and planning.  It is truly amazing what the body can do and sometimes we forget in today’s world of what the body is capable of.  Thanks Cirque Du Soleil for reminding me.  =)

The East raged, they spoke softly but carried speaks of metal as opposed to no weapons at all.  The East were spoken of as the Ionians.  While the Haceletons required a pledge with each utterance of the name they required a bow and a salute, the Ionians didn’t even require capitalization.  The law of the East more of self love and self value belief.  Don’t worship the one unless that one is yourself.

The war raged on.  The Haceltons fighting for themselves and the ionians fighting for their people.  Who won?  Who knows?  The battle still rages on today.  The love still rages on today.  The trust does not.